The Stark Family

Day 82 - Sunday 12/12/07

If you hadn’t noticed, the title has changed. Tym is no longer a residential care patient. He is now living at home (Jeremy’s home), and getting transportation to his therapy in Fullerton CA. His therapy is now only Monday, Wednesday, and Friday with many exceptions due to the holidays and the fact that the center is changing locations.

As a result of all this hustle, along with getting ready for the Holidays, and my trip to Virginia, it has been difficult to have time to keep the blog updated. I hope you can forgive me. Here’s some pictures of what we got to do last weekend…

Motorcycle Show

Motorcycle Stunt Show

Boat Ride

We got to go to the International Motorcycle show in Long Beach. Tym enjoyed the show, and got to sit on many of the 2008 bikes. He thought the stunt guys were very good, but that they are “lucky idiots”. Later that night Tym’s best friend, Jesse, took us out for the boat parade and to check out the holiday decorations on his and his wife, Chris’, boat. Thank you for showing us around Naples. We all had a very good time.

Sunday Tym and his daughter Becca started some holiday shopping. Tym made a list of people he is shopping for, and started buying them gifts. Monday he started his new rehab. The format is much different than the residential rehab at Winways. As I mentioned, it’s 3 days per week, and it’s from 9am - 4pm. You have to provide your own transportation and lunch. The environment is more like a recreation center. There are only a handful of rehab patients, but they are much closer to Tym in age and injury than those in the other rehab centers. Tym visited OCTA Access on Tuesday, and they will contact us to see if he qualifies for transportation to and from his rehab.

Today was Tym’s first full day of rehab. He says he likes it overall, and thinks it’s beneficial. As usual, he can’t wait until he can get back to driving, and get to go home (Santa Maria). Thank you for your continued support! Have safe and fun Holidays!

Day 72 - Sunday 12/02/07

We had another awesome weekend with our Dad Tym. We got to work on more projects for Jeremy, and go miniature golfing with Tym and his kids and Jessica and Jason.

Tym is progressing normally. He’s a bit confused about the different levels of care we have to deal with in the coming month(s). Tym does not enjoy having to learn to read, and gets frustrated with therapy easily. He just wants to be done already.

Tym’s parents (Norman and Barbara) got to join us for dinner Sunday evening.  Everyone seemed to enjoy the tri-tip. I had to remind Tym about Santa Maria, and this was the best way possible short of driving up there.

Day 64 - Saturday 11/24/07

Hope everyone had a Happy Thanksgiving! Looks like we made an impact at the Lompoc City Council Meeting. Read about it in the Lompoc Record (local newspaper):
http://www.lompocrecord.com/articles/2007/11/21/news/news02.txt

Hollywood Park - Thanksgiving Day

We had a great Thanksgiving Brunch at Hollywood Park along with the Robert’s Family! Thanks for letting us join your celebration. We enjoyed the food and races. We later went to Tym’s brother’s house, Mitch and Sandi, to play games and have pie with the “local” Starks. We haven’t seen our cousins in quite a while, and it was nice to get to spend some time with them.

David, Tym and Yvonne - Huntington Beach CA

Friday we spent the day with David and Yvonne (Tym’s nephew and his girlfriend). They are visiting from Arizona along with Tym’s brother-in-law Art (aka - Rick). Unfortunately Uncle Rick was feeling ill on Friday so he did not join us. After a long morning of changing out David’s worn truck suspension, we headed down to Huntington Beach. We had lunch at TK Burger, walked on the beach, shopped at Huntington Surf and Sport, then enjoyed Happy Hour with some of my (Jeremy’s) friends. Unfortunately Tym is not allowed to drink alcohol, but he seemed to enjoy watching the basketball games and his new clothes. We ended the night with some Starbucks and Finding Nemo. We had started that movie in the hospital, but Tym fell asleep about 15 minutes in. We got through the whole thing this time.

Tym didn’t help out too much with David’s suspension Friday, but mentioned he would have liked to. So Saturday he helped me work on a friends motorcycle. We had a great time, father and son, fixing up a wrecked bike. Tym said that fixing the bike felt natural. He said it was normal feeling to work on it, compared to the other stuff they have him do. He was an excellent helper, and knew exactly what to do, but had a little trouble with the names of all the tools. I have a lot of projects to do, and if my Dad wants to help me get through the list, I will be very grateful.

Saturday afternoon, we visited Eva and Brent’s house for a post-Thanksgiving party where we had the best tamales in the world. Thanks Mom! We watched some TV and visited with the Family. Uncle Rick luckily felt better today, and enjoyed the food and company as well. Tym enjoyed the food, and seeing his old pal Vanilla (our dog).

Tym was having a hard time this weekend battling his recent depression. We didn’t try to push anything to hard on him. He said, “It’s not from my thoughts, it’s just there! I don’t feel very happy to be alive.” We remind him of all of the people that love him, and those who saved his life without even knowing him. He says he’s grateful for all the great things that everyone has done, but he feels like he’s finished. “I’m done with life”, Tym said. We talked for a while, and I told him about ABI, and how depression is a completely normal part of recovery. I tried to get him to recognize that he can still enjoy life, and it’s up to him what he makes of it. Also, with Tym being a Christian, I reminded him that quitting isn’t an option. I told him that he is recovering very quickly compared to the average brain-injury patient, which means his depression should pass quickly as well. He’ll be attending church on Sunday, and I hope that he will feel much better afterwards.

Day 60 - Tuesday 11/20/07

We had the great honor of meeting Tym’s life-saving heroes last night as they were presented with Awards of Merit at the Lompoc City Council Meeting. Firefighter John Steffens and Airmen Brian Capps and Eric Voyles were presented awards at the meeting. Steven McCort was on assignment and unfortunately could not be there, but he will receive his well deserved award as well. We also presented our heroes with gift baskets stuffed with running goodies as well as our love and gratitude.

As expected, everyone we met last night was so awesome. They are truly self-less people who said that their real reward was being able to see Tym and shake his hand. Tym said he was very honored to meet everyone, and he thinks it’s incredible that they saved his life. He said it was very emotional, though you could easily see that in everyone’s eyes.

We also got to meet Christine Nelson who dialed 911, and rode her bike to the finish line where she met with John Steffens. All of their friends and loved ones were also there to show their support. Thank you all so very much! The entire Stark family was so honored to finally meet you.

We wish everyone a very Happy Thanksgiving!

Love,

The Stark Family

Day 58 - Sunday 11/18/07

Tym had another great weekend at home (Jeremy’s) with his family and friends. We picked him up Friday for dinner with his parents and kids. We ate at home this time to try and save some money. We played Apples to Apples again, and Tym showed a lot of improvement. He scored much better this time, and didn’t need as much help understanding the game.

Saturday’s big plan was to go to the LA Auto Show, but we decided against it at the last minute. We also considered Miniature Golf, but we went shopping instead. Tym had fun at the stores, and was pretty good at acting appropriately, although I had noticed that his Speech Therapist was right, he talks too much. It’s not that he shouldn’t talk to others, but when he speaks, he says too many words to get to his point, and often repeats himself. Saturday night we went to the Friends Becoming Family (FBF) monthly birthday dinner at Claim Jumper (pic). We had a great time with Tym and his wonderful friends from church. We came home and watched the end of the Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC), but it was pretty lame.

Sunday we woke up and Tym and his daughters, Rebecca and Stephanie, went to church. Everyone was excited to see Tym, as usual. A really touching moment was when everyone was going around giving thanks for things and Tym stood up and said, “I’m just thankful, cuz it was really close there. I’m glad those guys were running behind me and saved my life. I’m just thankful to be here.” After church, Tym was treated to lunch by his friends Alan and Sandy (thanks!) at Mimi’s Cafe. Tym came home and worked on his journal and read all about his implanted defibrillator. We had another home-cooked meal, then went back to the rehab center.

Tym is doing much better this weekend. He is more helpful and more aware of his environment. He will take actions when appropriate instead of waiting for someone to ask him. He even figured out his own medications correctly while I was cooking, and I double checked before he took them. We can’t wait to celebrate Thanksgiving with Tym, we are so glad to be able to enjoy the holidays with our dad, brother, son, and friend. Thank you all!

Day 51 - Sunday 11/11/07

Tym’s and his Friends Becoming Family (FBF) Family.

Tym finished out the week at Winways and appears much happier that he’s in a home setting, and close to his family and friends. This week, he got to see Bee Movie, eat In-N-Out, and go to the mall. Best of all, Tym got to spend his first weekend with the family (at home) and not in a hospital or rehab center. We had a great time having him around.

Saturday he was visited by some friends from his original church, 1st EV Free. We took him out to lunch, then over to Jeremy’s for the evening. We finally had dinner at Tym’s favorite restaurant, Red Robin. We came home and had a lot of fun playing Nintendo Wii. We played all the sports games. Tym was quite good at tennis, golf, and bowling. He was very competitive, and laughed and cheered himself on.

Sunday morning we woke up early and got cleaned up and dressed up for church. Tym and his whole family went to surprise his friends at 1st EV Free. We had a great time, and everyone was so happy to see him there. Thank you for all the kind prayers, hugs, and praise. After the services, we went to lunch at BJ’s restaurant in Brea with the family. We tried to test Tym on what he got out of the Pastor’s sermon, but he could not really remember anything specific.

We went to Costco to find Tym a nice recliner to sleep in, as he can’t sleep comfortably in a normal bed due to his surgery. Unfortunately it was a bust, but we did get some food for next weekend because going out to eat everyday is becoming expensive. We continued on home, and packed up. I tried to get Tym interested in reading because he’s currently less than motivated to read. I picked some Calvin and Hobbes books because they should be short and easy reading, and there are pictures to help explain the context. He struggles reading the comics without help, but hopefully he’ll be more willing to read. Later, we ordered pizza (ok, we are cooking from now on) and played the Apples to Apples board game. In the game you are supposed to relate your noun cards to the adjective cards read by the judge. This gave Tym a chance to test his cognitive skills. He seemed to have fun, but was not nearly as worthy of opponent as he was on the Wii. Then it was back to Winways for another week of therapy.

NOTE TO DAD:
READ Dad. READ, READ, READ! It’s your middle name, remember?
Ok, so it’s REED, but they both sound the same right?

Day 46 - Tuesday 11/06/07

Tym has been successfully transfered down to Winways Post-Acute Rehabilitation Center in Orange. We could not be happier that he is so close to his family and friends. He will enjoy being in a familiar community and in the great home-like atmosphere of Winways.

Tym packed up all of his belongings last night with the help of his parents Norm and Barbara. He was anxious to leave when Steph, Becca and I (Jeremy) arrived this morning to pick him up. We had a little sign-out procedure to wait through, and then we were off. Luckily there was minimal traffic, and we got down to Buena Park just in time for a nice lunch at Claim Jumper. We used to meet there for dinner with the family quite often. Then it was off to the pharmacy for his laundry-list of medications, and then to Winways. We had a great time meeting all of the staff, and showing Tym to his room, and then he was quickly wisked off to Physical Therapy. This is no place for slackers, that’s for sure.

The next couple of weeks will be a learning experience for Tym, and he will still be under some restrictions as a result of his surgery. He was in very good spirits today, and I know he will be much happier to be close to his family and friends. You all are welcome and encouraged to visit, so please post a note on this page as to when you’d like to go (after 4pm weekdays, or anytime on the weekends), and we will provide directions and make sure that Tym is available that day. We will also coordinate with others as to not have too many visitors at once, because the facility is limited on space being that it is a shared ranch-style home.

A big THANK YOU goes out to all of those people who have been involved in getting Tym this far in his recovery. We cannot do this alone, and all of your support does help!

Day 44 - Sunday 11/04/07

Today Tym had a very special visit from Harvey Wynne from the Lompoc Valley Distance Club (LVDC). Harvey was very proud and honored to be able to present Tym with a Valley of the Flowers Half-Marathon t-shirt along with his finisher’s medal! The LVDC also has been documenting Tym’s progress on their website:

http://members.impulse.net/~lvdc/Stark.htm

They have also mentioned Tym numerous times in their newsletter which you can navigate to on their website.

On behalf of the family I would like to thank Harvey, and everyone else at the Lompoc Valley Distance Club for keeping everyone updated on Tym’s progress. Thank you for presenting his finisher’s medal and for the very kind words and prayers. Harvey, you brought a tear to all of our eyes Sunday. Thanks!

Tym has a sling on as a reminder to not move his left arm around. He is healing well from the surgery, but does have a bit of pain in his shoulder and arm. He complains about trouble sleeping, and wishes he could get stronger drugs before bedtime. Tym will have restrictions for a couple of weeks on his left arm, but will return to his normal level of physical activity (post accident of course) very shortly.

Tym finished Sunday evening with dinner out on State St, “the strip” of downtown Santa Barbara. He was joined by his mom and dad, his Aunt Zanita, his son, and his daughter Stephanie. We had a nice time out, despite the cold weather. We are glad he got to spend his last weekend with his Aunt Zanita, who has been so supportive and generous by providing the family a place to stay. Thank you! We hope to get together for a family reunion as soon as Tym is up for it.

Day 42 - Friday 11/02/07

Tym is going in for an implantable cardioverter-defibrillator (ICD) this morning. His surgery is scheduled for 7:30am. He will be staying in the hospital overnight for recovery. The surgery is fairly routine (especially in these cases) and he should be on his way down to Orange County early next week. We were hoping to move him before his surgery, but at this time, surgery seems like the most expedient process.

ICD information:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Implantable_cardioverter-defibrillator

UPDATE - The surgery went very well and Tym is on track for release back to the acute care rehab center tomorrow morning. Tym says, “I’m not perfect, but I’m better than I was!”

Day 36 - Saturday 10/27/07

Tym is now considered a “Phase 2″, as you can see from the pictures, that means he can be signed out by a family member and taken off-site for short outings. We couldn’t be more excited. Neither could Tym. We tried to surprise him and let him pick what he wanted to do or eat, but he’s so amenable that we ended up picking for him. We picked Red Robin, one of his previously favorite restaurants, but the location had been closed down. That’s why we were standing around at the mall. We ended up at Elephant Bar instead.

We had a great time out at dinner, and Tym enjoyed having real food, and getting out of the rehab institute. We had good conversations and a lot of laughs. Tym laughed so hard that his face was beet red, and he claimed his ribs were hurting (they were broken during CPR). He participated well in the conversations, and was very polite and well mannered at the dinner table. We asked him about where he planned on going for his post-acute care, and he said that he thinks Bakersfield is “too far” and he’d rather be in Orange County.

Tym did exhibit memory problems, which is normal. He continued to ask where his wallet was, and where his “new” truck was. He was however, very aware of his current situation and surroundings. We jokingly offered Tym the keys to drive home with, and he said, “No, I can’t drive. I’m not allowed to drive.” Also, when Tym’s brother Mitch was pulling out of the parking lot, Tym said “Be careful, there’s a guy on a bicycle. Don’t hit him.”

Tym later asked about his cellphone, and whether people were trying to reach him. I explained that everyone knows he’s in the rehab institute and that they are leaving messages for him on the website. He does read your messages, so please keep it up. You can address Tym directly if you want. Please keep the messages for Tym short and simple.

Reminder - If you plan to visit, please post a note here, and we will coordinate your request so as not to interfere with therapy, evaluations, and other visits.