The Stark Family

Day 142 - Sunday 02/10/08

Tym is out of rehab now, and waiting for the next semester to start at the Coastline ABI program. He is doing very well, and is having a great time with his friends and family. He has gotten to do more and more things on his own and is making good progress in his speed and accuracy with all tasks.

We had a chance to go bowling with some of our friends. Tym did very well, he even beat us seasoned veterans. Although, we were taking it easy on him

Tym, Jeremy and friends go Bowling

Day 130 - Tuesday 01/29/08

Tym’s 52nd Birthday Party!

I am working from home today. It’s Tym’s birthday! He is doing well, but having trouble figuring out what to do with all of his mail (bills, doctors appointments, etc.) Much of normal life that we take for granted is hard and confusing for him. We continue to support his rehab, and are working hard on transitioning out of the St Jude CRC to the Coastline ABI program.

Thank you friends and loved ones who took Tym out to dinner for his birthday on Sunday. And thanks for the wonderful gifts. He is very excited about them. Sorry that I (Jeremy) had to miss the dinner. I was on travel for work all week. Tym stayed with Rebecca, and he adjusted well to the new environment. Tym will be celebrating his birthday with his family tonight (pictures to follow).

Otherwise we haven’t been up to much. We’ve been going to all of the Anaheim Supercross races. Tym and I enjoy them very much. We have gone to the movies as well, and thoroughly enjoyed The Bucket List, but Cloverfield not so much. This weekend marks the last Anaheim Supercross of the season, and along with Superbowl Sunday we have a busy weekend planned.

Happy Birthday Dad!!!

Day 114 - Tuesday 01/13/08

Tym with sister Marty, brother Mitch, and parents Norm and Barbara

Tym is doing progressively better with his rehabilitation. His short-term memory is slowly getting better, as are his occupational skills. Last week Tym was approved by his therapists to be independent in the community (walks, shopping, visiting friends, etc.). This also means that he can stay home alone for short periods without direct assistance/supervision. This has lifted a large weight off of the family.

Unfortunately, as it seems to always happen, as soon as one weight is lifted off, another heavy and awkward weight is carefully slammed right back on. Ahead of our family lies many hard decisions for Tym’s care. We found out just as soon as Tym was cleared for independence that his Non-Residential care will be over February 1st. Although surprising and exciting, this does not mean that he is “better” or ready to go home. As you all know, Tym’s Speech Therapy (cognition and expression) is the most troubling since his accident. Tym has been cleared of his Physical Therapy and is very close to clearing his Occupational Therapy. He will be taking an evaluation to see about taking a driving test (3.5 hours) early in February. If his responses are accurate and timely he will be recommended to take the driving evaluation. Speech Therapy however, can present a life-long struggle.

We have been referred to a community college program called Acquired Brain Injury (ABI, just like Anoxic Brain Injury) at Coastline Community College. It is a 2-year program that helps students (victims of Brain Injuries) overcome their disabilities, negative emotions, and frustrations. You can read more about the program on their website:

http://www.coastline.edu/departments.cfm?LinkID=418

The program looks very good, and we haven’t found much like it around the Southern California Area. We also had the pleasure of meeting one of the professors on staff at the ABI program. He was very nice, and helped Tym and family understand the concept of Injury vs. Disability vs. Handicap. Basically, the injury has happened and is out of your control. The disabilities are a result of the injury, and you can only help re-train your brain while it physically heals for about 6 months. Minimal improvement continues until about 2 years post-injury. From now until forever, Tym’s attitude and adaptations will help him overcome his disabilities, and those things become his handicap(s). We are confident that there are many other strategies and concepts taught throughout this program that will help Tym make the best recovery possible.

We are all for Tym’s to enrollment in the ABI Program. However, the problems presented are of residence (Tym and family), transportation, and finance (mostly real estate). We will need to shuffle the living arrangements around due to availability. This shuffle will hopefully help ease the burden on our friends and family as well. As far as transportation is concerned, we hope that Tym will be able to drive safely by the time the next semester begins. Lastly, we have to consider the possibility of Tym needing this program for a full 2-years, and the cost it will be to maintain his home in Santa Maria for that time along with rent around Orange County.

Tym has enjoyed his time since New Years. We got to go to opening round of Supercross, the Family Dinner at Winways, and this weekend Tym is up near Yosemite with his parents and brother. They are all visiting with Tym’s sister that he hasn’t seen for many years. Everyone is having a great time up there. It’s clear weather, and not too cold (62ºF). It was a very special time for everyone, and it brought my Grandma to tears (sorry Grandma).

Day 102 - Tuesday 01/01/08

Happy New Year! Hope everyone had fun celebrating Christmas and New Years! We sure did.

Christmas with the Starks in Garden Grove

Visit to Tym’s Santa Maria Home

Pismo Beach Run

Lunch in Santa Barbara (La Super Rica!)

As you can see we got to take a trip up to Tym’s house between Christmas and New Years. We all had a great time, and Tym was overjoyed to get to see everything again (finally). He was overwhelmed about how much work there is left to do to completely move-in to his new house. He says he’ll be busy for a long time when he finally gets to return home.

After we got a few things gathered and taken care of at the house, we took a trip up to Pismo Beach. Since it was a holiday weekend there were many people, bikes, trucks, and cool things to see. We walked the Pier, then went back home to have lunch, tie up some things around the house, and watch “As Good as it Gets”. Tym related well to Melvin’s quirky behavior even though he had OCD, and not ABI.

We came home in time to “Rock Out!” for New Years Eve by throwing a rock-theme party at home in Garden Grove. Unfortunately our camera battery was dead by that time. However, even Tym joined in and sang some songs for Rock Band (an xbox video game). Thanks to Rebecca, Stephanie, and our friends who came through at the last minute to get the party together.

Day 91 - Friday 12/21/07

Steph and Dwight compete in their first ever Dachshund Race

Last weekend we went to cheer on Dwight (Steph’s wiener dog) in the Old World Dachshund Races.

http://www.stockteam.com/dachshund-races-huntington-beach.html

Dwight did very well for his first time racing, and the whole family had a great time. The weekend was packed with Christmas Parties, shopping, wrapping, etc. I’m sure you all are doing the same things.

Tym is continuing rehab in the St Jude CRC. He likes the activities alright. Last Wednesday they got to go bowling, and Tym came home to brag that he beat everybody there. He bowled around a 150, but I didn’t tell him that’s only 1/2 the possible score. Tym is continuing his Physical, Occupational, and Speech Therapy as well as working on the computer doing email, driving simulation, and games. He still can’t wait to go home (Santa Maria) and to get to drive again.

Thank you for calling and always thinking of Tym during the holidays. He has a very large family at home as well as church. We are very busy, but enjoy every time we can be a part of your celebrations. Thanks for the invites, calls, prayers, and warm wishes. Have a Merry Christmas!

Day 82 - Sunday 12/12/07

If you hadn’t noticed, the title has changed. Tym is no longer a residential care patient. He is now living at home (Jeremy’s home), and getting transportation to his therapy in Fullerton CA. His therapy is now only Monday, Wednesday, and Friday with many exceptions due to the holidays and the fact that the center is changing locations.

As a result of all this hustle, along with getting ready for the Holidays, and my trip to Virginia, it has been difficult to have time to keep the blog updated. I hope you can forgive me. Here’s some pictures of what we got to do last weekend…

Motorcycle Show

Motorcycle Stunt Show

Boat Ride

We got to go to the International Motorcycle show in Long Beach. Tym enjoyed the show, and got to sit on many of the 2008 bikes. He thought the stunt guys were very good, but that they are “lucky idiots”. Later that night Tym’s best friend, Jesse, took us out for the boat parade and to check out the holiday decorations on his and his wife, Chris’, boat. Thank you for showing us around Naples. We all had a very good time.

Sunday Tym and his daughter Becca started some holiday shopping. Tym made a list of people he is shopping for, and started buying them gifts. Monday he started his new rehab. The format is much different than the residential rehab at Winways. As I mentioned, it’s 3 days per week, and it’s from 9am - 4pm. You have to provide your own transportation and lunch. The environment is more like a recreation center. There are only a handful of rehab patients, but they are much closer to Tym in age and injury than those in the other rehab centers. Tym visited OCTA Access on Tuesday, and they will contact us to see if he qualifies for transportation to and from his rehab.

Today was Tym’s first full day of rehab. He says he likes it overall, and thinks it’s beneficial. As usual, he can’t wait until he can get back to driving, and get to go home (Santa Maria). Thank you for your continued support! Have safe and fun Holidays!

Day 72 - Sunday 12/02/07

We had another awesome weekend with our Dad Tym. We got to work on more projects for Jeremy, and go miniature golfing with Tym and his kids and Jessica and Jason.

Tym is progressing normally. He’s a bit confused about the different levels of care we have to deal with in the coming month(s). Tym does not enjoy having to learn to read, and gets frustrated with therapy easily. He just wants to be done already.

Tym’s parents (Norman and Barbara) got to join us for dinner Sunday evening.  Everyone seemed to enjoy the tri-tip. I had to remind Tym about Santa Maria, and this was the best way possible short of driving up there.

Day 69 - Thursday 11/29/07

Tym is doing very well now, and his depression has luckily subsided. We are so glad he’s feeling better. Depression comes and goes unexpectedly in everyone’s life. We appreciate that Tym’s friends and family are helpful and encouraging in times like these.

As it turns out, Tym is doing so well, and medical insurance plans are always so frustrating, that he will be leaving residential care tomorrow (Friday 11/30). He will be moving in with me for the month of December while we try to transition him to his CRC Therapy Program at St Jude (Fullerton CA). As we understand it, the CRC program will be an all-day therapy session much like Tym participates in at Winways. The main differences are that he will not live/reside there, and the therapy is Monday, Wednesday, Friday only. The week(s) before the transition, we will have to schedule 3 separate appointments to meet with therapist, much like doctor’s appointments so Tym doesn’t miss out on too many sessions.

Tym is still not cleared for Independent Community Living, so a family member must always be with him. This will be especially difficult until we can start the CRC program. Hopefully this can all be resolved by January, when we may also need to find Tym another place to stay. There is also a transportation system called Access that will possibly be able to take Tym to and from his CRC therapy sessions. This will help out a lot and is very affordable.

Day 64 - Saturday 11/24/07

Hope everyone had a Happy Thanksgiving! Looks like we made an impact at the Lompoc City Council Meeting. Read about it in the Lompoc Record (local newspaper):
http://www.lompocrecord.com/articles/2007/11/21/news/news02.txt

Hollywood Park - Thanksgiving Day

We had a great Thanksgiving Brunch at Hollywood Park along with the Robert’s Family! Thanks for letting us join your celebration. We enjoyed the food and races. We later went to Tym’s brother’s house, Mitch and Sandi, to play games and have pie with the “local” Starks. We haven’t seen our cousins in quite a while, and it was nice to get to spend some time with them.

David, Tym and Yvonne - Huntington Beach CA

Friday we spent the day with David and Yvonne (Tym’s nephew and his girlfriend). They are visiting from Arizona along with Tym’s brother-in-law Art (aka - Rick). Unfortunately Uncle Rick was feeling ill on Friday so he did not join us. After a long morning of changing out David’s worn truck suspension, we headed down to Huntington Beach. We had lunch at TK Burger, walked on the beach, shopped at Huntington Surf and Sport, then enjoyed Happy Hour with some of my (Jeremy’s) friends. Unfortunately Tym is not allowed to drink alcohol, but he seemed to enjoy watching the basketball games and his new clothes. We ended the night with some Starbucks and Finding Nemo. We had started that movie in the hospital, but Tym fell asleep about 15 minutes in. We got through the whole thing this time.

Tym didn’t help out too much with David’s suspension Friday, but mentioned he would have liked to. So Saturday he helped me work on a friends motorcycle. We had a great time, father and son, fixing up a wrecked bike. Tym said that fixing the bike felt natural. He said it was normal feeling to work on it, compared to the other stuff they have him do. He was an excellent helper, and knew exactly what to do, but had a little trouble with the names of all the tools. I have a lot of projects to do, and if my Dad wants to help me get through the list, I will be very grateful.

Saturday afternoon, we visited Eva and Brent’s house for a post-Thanksgiving party where we had the best tamales in the world. Thanks Mom! We watched some TV and visited with the Family. Uncle Rick luckily felt better today, and enjoyed the food and company as well. Tym enjoyed the food, and seeing his old pal Vanilla (our dog).

Tym was having a hard time this weekend battling his recent depression. We didn’t try to push anything to hard on him. He said, “It’s not from my thoughts, it’s just there! I don’t feel very happy to be alive.” We remind him of all of the people that love him, and those who saved his life without even knowing him. He says he’s grateful for all the great things that everyone has done, but he feels like he’s finished. “I’m done with life”, Tym said. We talked for a while, and I told him about ABI, and how depression is a completely normal part of recovery. I tried to get him to recognize that he can still enjoy life, and it’s up to him what he makes of it. Also, with Tym being a Christian, I reminded him that quitting isn’t an option. I told him that he is recovering very quickly compared to the average brain-injury patient, which means his depression should pass quickly as well. He’ll be attending church on Sunday, and I hope that he will feel much better afterwards.

Day 60 - Tuesday 11/20/07

We had the great honor of meeting Tym’s life-saving heroes last night as they were presented with Awards of Merit at the Lompoc City Council Meeting. Firefighter John Steffens and Airmen Brian Capps and Eric Voyles were presented awards at the meeting. Steven McCort was on assignment and unfortunately could not be there, but he will receive his well deserved award as well. We also presented our heroes with gift baskets stuffed with running goodies as well as our love and gratitude.

As expected, everyone we met last night was so awesome. They are truly self-less people who said that their real reward was being able to see Tym and shake his hand. Tym said he was very honored to meet everyone, and he thinks it’s incredible that they saved his life. He said it was very emotional, though you could easily see that in everyone’s eyes.

We also got to meet Christine Nelson who dialed 911, and rode her bike to the finish line where she met with John Steffens. All of their friends and loved ones were also there to show their support. Thank you all so very much! The entire Stark family was so honored to finally meet you.

We wish everyone a very Happy Thanksgiving!

Love,

The Stark Family